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September 29.2025
2 Minutes Read

How to help your child overcome separation anxiety at nursery

Child and caregiver drawing together at nursery.

Separation anxiety: A normal response

Starting nursery is a significant milestone, yet it often brings along the waves of separation anxiety, a completely natural reaction for many children. This usually peaks around six months and can re-emerge during transitions, such as beginning nursery. Children may exhibit clinginess, tears, or even resistance when faced with leaving their parental figures in unfamiliar environments. Understand this: these behaviors signal uncertainty, not an inability to adapt to nursery life.

Prepare your child for nursery

Preparation can turn anxiety into excitement. Talk to your child about nursery in a positive light. Share the fun they'll have with new friends and engaging activities. If possible, make a visit before their first day. A sneak peek into their future world will instill familiarity and, consequently, less fear. Consider practicing short separations at home as well. For instance, step out of the room for a few minutes; this demonstrates your reliability when returning.

Establish a consistent routine

Predictability breeds comfort. Consistent morning routines serve as an anchor for your child during times of change. A calming routine—waking up at the same time, sharing breakfast, dressing leisurely—can set the stage for a smoother transition. If nursery routines align with what happens at home, your child will feel more secure, making it easier for them to settle in.

Keep goodbyes short and sweet

The temptation to linger during those tear-filled goodbyes is strong, but lengthy farewells can heighten anxiety. Instead, adopt a brief and upbeat goodbye—this might include a special phrase or hug. Your calm demeanor reassures your child. Confidence is contagious: if you project assurance, they’ll likely catch that feeling too. Remember, it’s perfectly normal for them to cry initially, but children usually stop soon after you leave and engage in play.

Collaborate with nursery staff for the best results

Know that the nursery staff are well-versed in easing separation anxiety. Share your concerns with them. They can provide support and updates on your child’s progress. Many nurseries offer settling-in sessions, where parents gradually leave their children in supportive environments. This allows for trust to build over time, easing the transition.

Embrace patience and celebrate progress

Lastly, be prepared for the fact that adaptation takes time. While some children may adjust within days, others might require weeks. Acknowledge and celebrate every small victory, such as moments of calmness after drop-off. Always remind your child how proud you are of their efforts. With patience, they will ultimately gain the confidence to embrace nursery life, finding joy in friendships and newfound independence.

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